Spam is cool

My Dearest One

I think your dearest one isn’t here at the moment, but do not try again later please.

I am a young girl of 23 years old , by name Miss Glory Beti. the Daughter of late of Dr Festus Neto. Beti. (…) who died (…) in September 11th 2001 at the World Trade Center in New York City USA. (…)

You poor thing…

Although I lost my Mother when she was putting birth to my younger brother who later died in the hospital with my mother fourtheen years ago in London United Kindom.

I actually died of laughter when I read this. ;)

Presently I am in Abidjan Cote d’Ivoire, where I am in a Refugee Camp where I decided to contact you as to assist me in transfering the sum of money my father left in a suspended account with this Financial Bank here in Abidjan. The amount is $8,000.000.00; 80% will be for investment, 17% will be for your kind help while 3% will be for any necessary expenses that may be incured. (…)

Your English is horrible! Now give me that f*cking money and leave me alone!

In addition I humbly solicit for your kindly assistance to help me in investing this money into a good and profitable business, (…) to help me to invest the the money into a business that will balance or give at least 100% profit in two years(…)

Wow! You’ll need 200% of luck to succeed…

Yours ever, Miss Glory Beti.

Yours never, someone

4 thoughts on “Spam is cool”

  1. “at least 100% profit in two years(‚Ķ)‚Äù
    Wow! You‚Äôll need 200% of luck to succeed‚Ķ”

    Nahh, invest in Nigerian Spam, if you find enough Idiots (aka AOL-Users) you will easily have 400% profit :)

    Oh and at least the have some imagination! They always come up stories that sounds the same as all the others, but hey, it is always something different! :) Give these guys some credit ;)

  2. Don’t be so hard on those AOL users, they’re not all that stupid. Well… maybe… okay you’re right. ;)

    Well they do have a special sense of humor which probably isn’t even intentional. :)

  3. OT: Ech sin n?´t ganz domat averstan, AOL-User ?´mmer als Idioten ofzestempelen. Natierlech ass ?´t sou, dat AOL (zumindest fr?©ier) jo e ganz propriet?§ren Verbindungssystem an Browser hat, souzesoen eppes idiotensecheres, wat awer och net ganz gudd war, vue que dat d’Benotzer keng Erfahrung sammlen konnten. An wahrscheinlech k?´nnt d?©i Onfiersichtegkeet, d?©i den AOL-User ?´mmer nogesot g?´tt dohier, dat si eben ?´mmer am Glawen gelos goufen, dat ?´t bei “AOL n?§ischt B?©ises g?´tt”.
    Dofier kann den eenzelnen User awer n?§ischt, an ass dow?©ins och nach laang n?´t domm oder bl??d.
    An wat ass falsch dorun, wann e Familiepapp zum Beispill lo op der Tele oder an der Zeidung eng Reklamm (fier AOL) ges?§it, wou d’Surfen ganz einfach an familienfr?´ndlech duergestallt g?´tt, wou dat “PC-Geschier” dach ?´mmer sou fuechtbar kompliz?©iert soll sin, an sech doropshin en Abo do h?´llt. Ass dach eigentlech eng gudd novollz?©ibar Entscheedung.

    Boff, dat war lo n?´mmen e Kommentar zu eppes ganz Onwichtegem, mee wollt et op d?´ser Plaatz einfach mol soen :) An nee, ech giff mer och n?´t AOL huelen wann ech kinnt, an sin mat villem wat een sou vun hinnen h?©iert n?´t averstan, mee awer och n?´mmen well ech vu mier selwer ka behaapten eng gew?´ssen Erfahrung an S?´cherheet an Saachen PC / Internet ze hun. Wien wees, ob ech ‘t selwecht g?©ing denken wann ech Anf?§nger wier.

  4. Jo, d?©i Onwessenheet vun den AOL Notzer kennt wahrscheinlech genau dovunner. Mee d?©i AOL Benotzer kr?©ien jo awer garant?©iert och mat, dass et emmer heescht si wieren net grad d?©i Schlaust an si h?©iren garant?©iert och vun der Kritik vis ?† vis vun AOL, an dann gin se nach net stutzeg?

    Ee G?©igebeispill: ee Familienpapp ges?§it an enger zeitung eng Reklamm fir een Auto deen soll immens familiensecher sin, da keeft en deen dach och net direkt, mee geet sech fird?©ischt mol ronderem infrorm?©iren ob dat wierklech elo sou ass w?©i dat an der Reklamm duergestallt gett. :) Eppes op eng Reklamm hin ze kaafen ass keng novollz?©ibar Entscheedung, jiddefalls net fir mech. ;)

    Heiandsdo muss een och mol iwwer manner wichteges schw?§tzen. An am flottsten ass et wann een da sou mecht w?©i wann et dat wichtegst op der Welt wier. :D Also w?©inst menger kennen mer eis och elo g?§ren bessen d’K?§pp aschloen hei. :)

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